Do you Trust Your Mate?

Trusting your mate is one of the most difficult issues that couples in long distance relationships have to deal with. It is difficult due to the distance and not being able to see your mate. Thoughts of infidelity and other misdeeds can easily creep into your mind. You begin to think, “Is he seeing someone else?” or “Is she going out partying every night?” If those statements remind you of yourself, please read on and follow the steps suggested below.


Step 1:~
The first step is to analyze whether the distance between you and your mate or your mate as a person causes your trust issues. Are there specific actions that your mate is doing that trigger your mistrust? For example, is he or she always hard to get a hold of on the phone or does he or she not introduce you to friends and family? If yes, then you may have justification for your mistrust and should discuss them openly with your mate. Otherwise, it is more than likely that your mistrust is rooted in the distance between you two and not based on your mate’s actions. This type of mistrust lies within yourself, as your mate is not doing anything wrong. If you fall within this category, you should definitely follow step two.


Step 2:~
The second step is to make an investment in a good self-help book. Building trust is not an overnight process and you are not going to find all the answers on the web. Most good self-help books will have exercises and a plan laid out for you to follow. You will gradually start to build trust in not only your long distance relationship, but with all other relationships as well. Below are some suggested books that you can take a look at.
The Courage To Trust: A Guide To Building Deep And Lasting Relationships
Broken Promises, Mended Hearts : Maintaining Trust in Love Relationships
Building Trust : In Business, Politics, Relationships, and Life


Summary:~
In summary, trust is a complicated issue and they key in long distance relationships is to determine whether the trust issues are based on fact or if the issues lie within yourself. If they are based on fact, you should confront your mate and discuss the issues with him or her. If they lie within yourself, you should find some books to help you to build your trust.

Communication Tips for Long Distance Relationship

If you have been in your long distance relationship for a while, you probably know that it sometimes can be hard to come up with things to talk about on the phone. This is not because the two of you are not compatible, it’s because couples in long distance relationships are on the phone so much they usually exhaust topics really fast. How many times can you ask how the other person’s day was, right? Below is a list of interesting conversation topics that will hopefully keep your phone calls fresh. Scan the newspaper or your favorite online news source for the latest currents events. Pick a topic that you think will interest your mate and discuss it with him or her.


1. Ask Questions
This may seem obvious, but most people just don't ask enough questions. I'm not talking about “How was your day?” or “What is the weather like,” but rather questions that will help you get to know your mate better. Typically these questions are not one-word answers and will lead to further conversation. Some examples are below:
If you were going to be stuck on a deserted island and you could only bring three things with you, what would it be and why?
What's the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you?


2. Talk About Your Mate
People love to talk about themselves and their hobbies. Find out what your mate is passionate about and then learn as much as you can about the subject. Once you have learned as much as you can, you can discuss it with your mate the next time you are on the phone together. Your mate will be impressed with you taking the time to learn about his or her passion.


3. Talk about Friends and Family
Talking about friends and family is an important step to making a long distance relationship successful. If the two of you decide to get married one day, you will need to interact with your mate’s friends and family, so it’s a good idea to get to know what they are like.
In closing, I’d like to mention that the most important part of the conversation is not what you say, but rather how well you listen. Listen to what your mate is saying to you and you'll always have something to talk about.

Tips for Long Distance Relationship

Tips 1:
Take pictures of everyday activities and send them to your mate.
A picture is worth a thousand words and can help you and your mate feel closer together in your long distance relationship. Today, with most cell phones equipped with a digital camera and cameras small enough to fit in your pocket, it’s very easy and convenient to take pictures and email them to your mate. With pictures, your mate can easily know what you are talking about when you describe the great party you went to or the new hairstyle that you just got. Some other examples of when you can take a picture are listed below:
* New outfit that your have purchased.
* Family or friends get together.
* Changes to your bedroom.
* Changes to your physical appearance (hairstyle, piercing, etc.)
* Pictures of your office or cubicle.


Tips 2:
Send gifts to your mate’s from their local country or city.
You can save a lot of money by searching the Internet for local companies to buy from and deliver your gifts. For example, if you are living in the United States and your mate is from Italy, find an Italian company that has the great gift that you want to send to your mate. In most cases, you will save on international shipping costs and you might even save on the currency exchange rate. Also, a local company will be able to deliver a gift much quicker for those last minute shoppers.


Tips 3:
Use text-messaging capability to keep in touch more frequently.
Text messaging can be a simple was to keep in touch with your mate in a long distance relationship. For those across the border relationships, this can also be an inexpensive way to communicate. It’s not always convenient to call, so text messages are a good alternative. You can send good night messages or little love notes throughout the day.


Tips 4:
Trust your mate.
Ideas of mistrust can easily seep into the minds of those involved in a long distance relationship because you don’t get to physically see your mate. They may be saying that they are not seeing anyone else, but how do you know that for sure hundreds or even thousands of miles away? This mistrust can ultimately lead to the relationship ending. You should approach the trust issue in a long distance relationship the same way as you would in a normal relationship. If there is no indication or evidence of cheating, it is most likely not happening.


Tips 5:
Introduce your mate to your friends and family.
How many times have you been out with your friends and you bring up your mate into conversation and your friends don’t believe he/she even exists? It is typical in a long distance relationship when two people visit each other they spend time only with each other. Although it is necessary to have time together, it is also necessary for your mate to experience other aspects of your life. Introduce him/her to your friends and family, so they can get to know your mate. It will only broaden your relationship and it will have a greater chance to succeed.


Tips 6:
Visit each other frequently.
This is not really a tip for a long distance relationship to be successful, but rather a requirement. To keep your long distance relationship going, you need to have in your mind the feeling and emotions of being with your mate. What keeps you together while you are apart is the idea of eventually being together. This can only be achieved by visiting each other whenever you have a chance.


Tips 7:
Ease into being together.
It can sometimes be difficult for two people who are involved in a long distance relationship to connect easily when they are together with their mate. Yes, you probably know everything about each other and talk everyday, but that is not a substitute for real contact. Both of you will need some time to adjust to being in each other’s presence. Be aware that it may take your mate longer than you and you should allow them that time.


Tips 8:
Write letters and send cards.
Nothing is more romantic than a handwritten letter or card that you send to your mate for no reason at all. Variety in a long distance relationship will help keep things new and fresh. Your mate will appreciate the fact that you took time out to write such a wonderful letter or sent a card.

爱情像... ...

你们认为爱情想什么呢？有人说爱情像水，温柔明亮；也有人说，爱情像酒，越久越醉；还有人说，爱情像风，来去无踪... ...

我说，爱情像一双筷子。

男人女人分别是一根筷子，两跟筷子有缘握在一起，成为一双筷子，那就是爱情。

一双筷子，心往一处想，力往一处使，才能把美好的日子夹起来。男人女人，少了哪一个都不行。

一双筷子，必须有一个支点。西方人很难学会使用筷子因为他们很难找到筷子的平衡点。想让两根毫不相干的筷子牢牢的夹住食物，其中一根就应该放低姿态，给另外一根筷子一个有力的支点。手指的力度只是一个小小的技巧。是的，爱情往往也许要一点点技巧，但是心灵的配合默契才是根本，真情是永远第一位的！

既然筷子的作用总是需要双方共同来完成，为什么不设计一根连体筷子？那就不是筷子了而是夹子。不错夹子也可以夹起东西，可是夹子无法张的更大，夹子的容量是有限的。而筷子是自由的，它可以狮子大开口，把所有美好的东西尽收壤中。这就是爱情得力量！爱情像一双筷子，而不是剪刀。剪刀过于尖利，总是要撕烂破坏，剪刀的心中没有温情，爱情需要建设需要呵护；爱情像一双筷子，而不是老虎钳。老虎钳的力量不可谓不大，可是它的控制欲太强了，而爱情需要温柔体贴。

筷子有很多种，有竹，木，朔胶，金和银制的。人也一样。人没有贵贱之分，却有文化的差异，习性各不同。一根筷子，长短粗细不一，不行。看看自己是怎样的一双筷子，也许可以帮你在茫茫人海中尽快找到自己的另一半。

也有一种筷子叫方便筷。这种筷子简单而粗糙，用了就丢，是一次性的。一次性的筷子，与爱情无关。这就是一夜情没有爱情的。

爱情所以像一双筷子，最根本的一点在于，他们之间谁也离不开谁，为了生活幸福，永远不离不弃；他们总是一起品尝生活的酸甜苦辣，共同承担着人生的风风雨雨。这就是美好爱情的特征！

太傻

痴痴地想了多少夜

我还是不了解

是什么

让我们今天

会分别

反正梦都是太匆匆

反正爱只能那么浓

心与感情让它粉碎

飘散在风中

只是为何当初你是不听所有

纷纷扰扰流言之中漫天风雨

你会选择了我

只是为何如今我们不顾一切

追求真爱坚持底又

苦尽甘来

你会放弃了我

再说你也不会懂

心再痛你能做什么

不再将自己深锁

错了又错

守住你的承诺太傻

只怪自己被爱迷惑

说过的话已不重要

可是我从不曾忘掉

守住你的承诺太傻

只怪自己被爱迷惑

醉过的心那里去找

对着满满空虚回忆

怎么逃

痴痴地想了

多少夜

我还是不了解

是什么

让我们今天

会分别 反正梦都是太匆匆

反正爱只能那么浓

心与感情让它粉碎

飘散在风中

只是为何当初你是不听所有

纷纷扰扰流言之中漫天风雨

你会选择了我

只是为何如今我们不顾一切

追求真爱坚持底又苦尽甘来

你会放弃了我

再说你也不会懂

心再痛你能做什么

不再将自己深锁

错了又错

守住你的承诺太傻

只怪自己被爱迷惑

说过的话已不重要

可是我从不曾忘掉

守住你的承诺太傻

只怪自己被爱迷惑

醉过的心那里去找

对着满满空虚回忆

怎么逃

守住你的承诺太傻

只怪自己被爱迷惑

说过的话已不重要

可是我从不曾忘掉

守住你的承诺太傻

只怪自己被爱迷惑

醉过的心那里去找

对着满满空虚回忆

怎么逃

~END~

I Believe

在我的视线

有一个模糊的光芒 指引我追寻心里的梦想

每一天我需要多一点勇气 灌溉我的心 让信心能继续

我知道这旅程一定会很艰难必须面对这一切 不管多累

I Believe 我有一天会能够让自己所有的梦想实现

wo yeah~

我知道会有一天 生命中的希望会在我眼前出现

wo wo yeah~

再也不用一直怀疑 因为爱存在我心里面

Coz I Believe~~~

Coz I Believe~~

要看清楚 很容易迷失了方向

追寻这个梦 让未来发光

oh..不怕错 只怕我知道不敢做绝不能轻易

把一切都放弃 我知道 这旅程一定会很艰难

必须面对这一切 不管多累

I Believe ~

我有一天 会能够让自己所有的梦想实现

wo yeah~~

我知道会有一天 生命中的希望会在我眼前出现

wo wo yeah~~~

再也不用一直怀疑 因为爱存在我心里面

I Believe~

就在今天 我一定让自己所有的梦想实现

wo~再也不用一直怀疑 因为爱存在我心里面

Coz I Believe~

因为我相信在眼前 每一个梦想都实现

我看的清楚 看的很清楚

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